Love me some pickles. . I Anonymous 12/ 23/ ) No. 522930202 Tell me about it. sweat to the stare an Thursday abought a half gallon jar of pickles Have me same p 4Chan pickles
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Love me some pickles

I Anonymous 12/ 23/ ) No. 522930202
Tell me about it.
sweat to the stare an Thursday
abought a half gallon jar of pickles
Have me same pickles
seat we as saw as I get home
we good I decide I' ll have a few mare
awalk hacket my computer and start to work but the urge is not sated
shat by a long shat
name hacket pickle jar several mare time
seat several pickles each time
rafter an hour the jar is empty
I] of my daily sodium livertaster m good
minutes later I hear a churning in my stomach
mat a light rumbling, sounds like the noise an old tub makes when Wu suddenly pull the drain
sprint to bathroom made
bearely get my ass an the tailed as a fucking waterfall emerges my asshole
waver in my life have relief and horror been such close bedfellows
rafter about ten seconds of continuous familt it subsides to a trickle and stops
itoilet water is green and smells like vinegar
ybody didn' t even trata digest that shit
mclean up and W hacket computer
thiinking "thank god that' s over"
Even. Close.
Mave minutes Afterthe rumbling is back
seven time
reprint to bathroom, lather, rinse, repeat
tthis happens five mare fucking times
aite; finally all gane
is concave: I have never had less food inside my body
cleaned out
bcue rumble
asit an tailed but it' s different this time
kl ; nothing in there
whit out a tiny amount illiquid, immediately feel better
Ewell I guess there was just a tiny bit left. that wasn' t m -"
sail at ance the burning fire afa thousand ) suns sets man my anal sphincter
kl had just shat out pure stomach acid
gigantically wipe at my ass to prevent it melting away like the spaceship :) or in Alien
in shower, turn cold water an full blast, and lie prone while gently sobbing
off and crawl exhausted into bed at we in the afternoon
asleep hours
In retrospect, it was all tatally worth it.
Have me some pickles.
Views: 44491 Submitted: 06/11/2014
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#5 - chodes
Reply +125 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
I've been there before. I know the pain he describes.   
The most unholy of burns.
I've been there before. I know the pain he describes.

The most unholy of burns.
#6 to #5 - anon
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
how do you **** out stomach acid?!
#7 to #6 - chodes
Reply +172 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
Very carefully.
User avatar #34 to #6 - dsendz
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
through your ass
User avatar #28 to #6 - lolikikolik
Reply -6 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
you dont, its ********
User avatar #81 to #5 - orangepikmin
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
It sounds like you were both put in quite the pickle.
#9 - masqueraide
Reply +146 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
Not the first time OP's butthole has been ravaged by a pickle.
User avatar #35 to #9 - elgrind
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
No, I don't see what you mean.
#27 to #9 - ewr
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
User avatar #46 to #9 - catpisseverdeen
Reply +16 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
First time I've seen that properly used.
User avatar #52 to #46 - drewhamster
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
It has been awhile.
#8 - casualbench
Reply +64 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
**casualbench rolled image**
**casualbench rolled image**
User avatar #98 to #8 - butterduck
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
The amount of relevence is real.
#1 - daftiduck
Reply +61 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
Well, I haven't heard that one before.
#55 to #1 - ishotthedeputy
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
You still haven't heard it You saw it hue
#17 - ihateaccountnames
Reply +41 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
I guess you could say he got into a bit of a pickle    
 Or it got into him
I guess you could say he got into a bit of a pickle

Or it got into him
#2 - immatakeaduty
Reply +41 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
"frantically wipe at my ass"
User avatar #84 to #2 - landartheconqueror
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
"my ass is eating my hand! it hungers... for more!"
#32 - anon
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
Sorta Related... XDD
#33 to #32 - logickid
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
#61 - bloodynips
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
User avatar #62 to #61 - badmotorfinger
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
User avatar #86 to #61 - dudewitharake
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
never forget
#48 - catpisseverdeen
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
Seriously? None of you faggots?
#50 to #48 - greatcornholio
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #57 to #50 - gothpride
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
Here you go. "Consumtion of some sugar free candies may cause stomach discomfort and/or a laxative effect.
Individual tolerance will vary.
If this is the first time you've tried these candies, we recommend beginning with one-fourth of a serving size or less."
#103 to #50 - anon
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
User avatar #96 to #50 - thighhighkneesocks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
(I'm going to warn you, this is coming in segments.) This review is from: Haribo Gummi Bears Sugar Free 5lb Bag (Grocery)
Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

First of all, for taste I would rate these a 5. So good. Soft, true-to-taste fruit flavors like the sugar variety...I was a happy camper.

BUT (or should I say BUTT), not long after eating about 20 of these all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me.

Then came the, uh, flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroyd, the sounds, like trumpets calling the demons back to Hell...the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear of succumbing to my own odors.

But wait; there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a coffee straw. I swear my sphincters were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile vomiting a torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. NAPALM. It was actually a bit humorous (for a nanosecond)as it was just beyond anything I could imagine possible.


I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005.
User avatar #97 to #96 - thighhighkneesocks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/12/2014) [-]
I had FIVE POUNDS of these innocent-looking delicious-tasting HELLBEARS so I told a friend about what happened to me, thinking it HAD to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute, and in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her chances and take them off my hands.

Silly woman. All of the same for her, and a phone call from her while on the toilet (because you kinda end up living in the bathroom for a spell) telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying.

Her sister was skeptical and suspected that we were exaggerating. She took them to work, since there was still 99% of a 5 pound bag left. She works for a construction company, where there are builders, roofers, house painters, landscapers, etc. Lots of people who generally have limited access to toilets on a given day. I can't imagine where all of those poor men (and women) pooped that day. I keep envisioning men on roofs, crossing their legs and trying to decide if they can make it down the ladder, or if they should just jump.

If you order these, best of luck to you. And please, don't post a video review during the aftershocks.

PS: When I ordered these, the warnings and disclaimers and legalese were NOT posted. I'm not a moron. Also, not sure why so many people assume I'm a man. I am a woman. We poop too. Of course, our poop sparkles and smells like a walk in a meadow of wildflowers. Thanks for all the great comments. I've been enjoying reading them and so glad that the horror show I experienced from snacking on these has at least made some people smile.
User avatar #16 - captainpickles
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(06/11/2014) [-]
<3 love you too