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Lesbians

Things just transpired in my house hold that
are equal parts offensive and hilarious... Here
goes.
So my roommate, Dale, has a gt who does
not live with us, but she' s here all the time.
So Sunday when my gt was her we were on
the couch and we kissed (scandalous, I
know) and she saw it, and I' m pretty sure
that' s the first time she' s seen us be
affectionate, that' s neither here nor there.
so today she tells Dale she' s "uncomfortable"
here and wants him to move out because she
thinks me and my lady are going to hit on her
or something, she doesn' t like living with
lesbians, cause it' s not "normal'', so now I' m
pissed. Then, Dale goes, "well you don' t live
here, so it shouldn' t be a problem, just stop
coming over". -things escalated and Dale is
trying to break up with her, but she won' t
leave our house.... she looked herself in Dales
room.
So, Dale barges in my room wearing a
bathrobe and goes, "ball every lesbian you
know, we' re smoking this bitch out!" Then
turns around and whips his robe like a cape-
And that' s the story of how there are 8
lesbians climbing through the window
Dales room
Holy **** .
...
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Views: 47349
Favorited: 201
Submitted: 04/03/2015
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[ 239 comments ]
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94 comments displayed.
#17 - misterpinkle (04/04/2015) [-]
Send in the lesbians.
User avatar #127 to #17 - imoriginalposter (04/04/2015) [-]
I read it in his ******* voice.
#7 - OtisMcWonderful (04/03/2015) [-]
>tfw I'll never have 8 lesbians climbing through my window
0
#148 to #7 - repel has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #187 to #7 - cluckycluckerson (04/04/2015) [-]
i have. i just had to get out the lesbojerky I have in my closet
#49 to #7 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
why are you sad they still wouldn't **** you your not a woman
#50 to #49 - OtisMcWonderful (04/04/2015) [-]
>implying I wouldn't want to watch
User avatar #25 to #7 - satansferret ONLINE (04/04/2015) [-]
*roll image* mfw i have.
User avatar #125 to #29 - satansferret ONLINE (04/04/2015) [-]
V
User avatar #28 to #27 - satansferret ONLINE (04/04/2015) [-]
Problem solved but damn you're fast.
#30 to #28 - OtisMcWonderful (04/04/2015) [-]
I saw my chance, and I took it.
I saw my chance, and I took it.
#26 to #25 - satansferret ONLINE (04/04/2015) [-]
**satansferret used "*roll picture*"**
**satansferret rolled image** *****
User avatar #134 to #7 - inomgod (04/04/2015) [-]
Call every lesbian you know, we're smoking this bitch out!
#140 to #7 - ledhendrix (04/04/2015) [-]
it's probably because you're too much of a pussy to let them in
#149 to #140 - OtisMcWonderful (04/04/2015) [-]
Bitch please, if I was a pussy, wouldn't that mean they'd be trying to get in anyway?
User avatar #87 to #20 - akihiro (04/04/2015) [-]
God i love that song..Still wan't to learn it on piano >.>
User avatar #123 to #87 - moorgar (04/04/2015) [-]
Synthesia - Kingdom Hearts: Dearly Beloved (Kyle Landry)

here ya go, the part you want is after minute 5

i give you a week to learn it
#34 to #20 - shulkexplains (04/04/2015) [-]
anyone know the sauce on that song?
#38 to #36 - shulkexplains (04/04/2015) [-]
Thanks a ton mate
User avatar #39 to #38 - Heracross (04/04/2015) [-]
you're welcome. its not quite the same as the webem but its the same song just a different tone.
#200 to #34 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
This specific piece is from around 4:25 in this. Kingdom Hearts II Soundtrack - Fantasia alla marcia for piano
#6 - mrsnowballs ONLINE (04/03/2015) [-]
Comment Picture
#23 - Wasad (04/04/2015) [-]
Comment Picture
#212 to #23 - rapsuskiller (04/04/2015) [-]
Awe yissssss   
Motha   
			*******		   
Scott Pilgrim!
Awe yissssss
Motha
*******
Scott Pilgrim!
#2 - elsanna (04/03/2015) [-]
10/10
User avatar #114 to #2 - straightbusta (04/04/2015) [-]
mate.
you can't just NOT give us the source
#192 to #117 - furiousmarshmellow (04/04/2015) [-]
It's not porn.
It's not porn.
#118 - assassindash (04/04/2015) [-]
Could you imagine if all of her lesbian friends called of their lesbian friends?   
   
Just hundreds of lesbians forming a wall around the house....   
   
Dale's face when he called in a lesbian army.
Could you imagine if all of her lesbian friends called of their lesbian friends?

Just hundreds of lesbians forming a wall around the house....

Dale's face when he called in a lesbian army.
User avatar #162 to #118 - Mawxter (04/04/2015) [-]
After they're done there, we can take them and drive out the Persians. This idea gets better and better.
User avatar #14 - bakinboy (04/04/2015) [-]
"whips his robe like a cape"
glorious
#1 - imjared (04/03/2015) [-]
same sex powers ACTIVATE
form of lesbian ladder!
User avatar #181 to #1 - Churchandtex (04/04/2015) [-]
Shape of Bisexual ugh.... Bike. Sorry, I'm not full gay so my powers aren't as good.
User avatar #52 to #1 - vishnarg (04/04/2015) [-]
Hurr durr I'm a lesbian thumbs pls
#130 to #52 - miknab (04/04/2015) [-]
Comment Picture
#239 to #52 - imjared (04/06/2015) [-]
i'm not even female, dude
User avatar #240 to #239 - vishnarg (04/07/2015) [-]
k den
#21 to #1 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
#3 - addmyn (04/03/2015) [-]
ah the sweet smell of destroying homophobes with that which they fear the most
User avatar #199 to #3 - scapeartist (04/04/2015) [-]
Thumbed for tacos
#18 to #3 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
******** "look how bad these strawmen are" stories?
User avatar #170 to #18 - roddor (04/04/2015) [-]
Sorta like all the "owning SJW" stories on 4chan?
User avatar #219 to #170 - renespar (04/05/2015) [-]
nono, shh, don't tell them the stories are mostly made up, it will make him have to think of the world in other ways than black and white, and that both ends of the spectrum are almost exactly the same in every way
User avatar #31 to #18 - addmyn (04/04/2015) [-]
anonexplain plz?
User avatar #141 to #3 - infinitereaper (04/04/2015) [-]
Most people who dislike gays don't fear them they hate them. attaching phobe to something is usually just politically correct propaganda
User avatar #151 to #141 - renespar (04/04/2015) [-]
well, most irrational hate is tied to fear in my experience
User avatar #205 to #141 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/04/2015) [-]
I guess you could call it bigotry, but that usually implies you don't like them because of their religion or race or something. Yeah, it's an incorrect use of the term, but it has been pretty much universally adapted to also mean "people who hate the gays" so I don't know why you're getting all autismo about it.
User avatar #216 to #205 - infinitereaper (04/04/2015) [-]
Because words are important. George Orwell understood that. He also understood the ******** in political writing and how it dumbs down society and free thought. Hate is hate. You don't always need to label it, and those that do usually do so politically. As for me, I hate everyone equally.
User avatar #217 to #216 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/04/2015) [-]
Nice appeal to authority, but it doesn't bolster your argument at all. You're getting mad at the modern definition of a word, which is ******* stupid, especially since it doesn't dumb down society or limit your freedom of speech or thought.

>I hate everyone equally

El Edgy Autismo 3000.
User avatar #220 to #217 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
No you ******* retard, homophobia means fear of gays, hate of gays =/= fear. Dumbass. not your politically corrects propaganda ******** you ******* stupid piece of trash
User avatar #221 to #220 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
You don't know what the word "colloquial" means, do you? Besides, here's thee definition from the Meriam-Webster dictionary: "irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or homosexuals."

Who's the ******* retard now? Trick question, it's you. Maybe you should google the definition of the word your autistically raging about before calling others stupid, huh?
User avatar #222 to #221 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
You will always be a prissy little faggot. I'd seriously beat the **** out of you if I knew you irl. One way or another. You're ****** retarded. Everything wrong with the world. Lack of common sense. It really astounds me.
#223 to #222 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
>wah you proved me wrong now I'm gonna make my lame, edgy, autistic little threats

Ten to one you're a manlet dough boy who would have trouble beating up a donut let alone me, so save your internet tough guy ******** . You're just like the SJWs who change the definitions of words in a desperate attempt to try to pretend they are still right in the face of evidence that proves them entirely wrong. You can throw a tantrum all you want, but it doesn't make you any less wrong.
User avatar #225 to #223 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
and for ***** sake learn to use that word right www.funnyjunk.com/The+fj+dicktionary/funny-pictures/5504789

faggot*
User avatar #224 to #223 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
I'm not wrong tho, it's the other way around. The fact you faggots have to form a club to "discredit" what is common sense only further proves the point. Political correctness is cancer, just like you.
User avatar #227 to #224 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
It's especially funny that you say that homophobia doesn't mean what it means just because a dictionary says it, then say I am using autistic wrong by linking to a dictionary definition. Maybe you really aren't autistic and you're just brain damaged? Either way, just stop ******* talking.
#226 to #224 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
>The Meriam-Webster dictionary is a club and not one of the most respected dictionaries on the planet   
>link to a 			*******		 "dictionary" on Fj in a desperate attempt to pretend he's right in some small aspect   
   
God you are 			*******		 stupid. 1) you are literally autistic because you flip out over little 			****		 in spite of all social cues and pressures telling you that you are not only wrong, but overreacting: "Examples of this include thinking literal" ie flip out that a word with "phobia" in it doesn't just mean fear of the thing. Also, "The word generally means people behaving or saying 			****		 that is so retarded you'd have to wonder if they were autistic, since most autistic people appear normal, but as stated before, have certain brain problems that makes them well, "weird." and unable to understand, well, people." Explains you to a tee, though it doesn't excuse you acting like a 			*******		 moron and pretending like you know more than the 			*******		 dictionary definition. Like I said, you're just like SJWs changing the definitions of words to try to suit your argument even when all the evidence is arrayed against you.   
   
2) God you are 			*******		 stupid. You can bitch and whine like the middle schooler you are all you want and pretend like it's the world that's wrong and not you, but that doesn't change reality you dumb cuck faggot.
>The Meriam-Webster dictionary is a club and not one of the most respected dictionaries on the planet
>link to a ******* "dictionary" on Fj in a desperate attempt to pretend he's right in some small aspect

God you are ******* stupid. 1) you are literally autistic because you flip out over little **** in spite of all social cues and pressures telling you that you are not only wrong, but overreacting: "Examples of this include thinking literal" ie flip out that a word with "phobia" in it doesn't just mean fear of the thing. Also, "The word generally means people behaving or saying **** that is so retarded you'd have to wonder if they were autistic, since most autistic people appear normal, but as stated before, have certain brain problems that makes them well, "weird." and unable to understand, well, people." Explains you to a tee, though it doesn't excuse you acting like a ******* moron and pretending like you know more than the ******* dictionary definition. Like I said, you're just like SJWs changing the definitions of words to try to suit your argument even when all the evidence is arrayed against you.

2) God you are ******* stupid. You can bitch and whine like the middle schooler you are all you want and pretend like it's the world that's wrong and not you, but that doesn't change reality you dumb cuck faggot.
#228 to #226 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
Either way, and I'd rather not bring up the whole English thing since it's basically a gaint 			***********		, but my point still stands, most people who are "phobic" don't fear gays, they hate them. That' is not wrong. It is correct. Fear has nothing to do with it most of the time. That is just political.    
   
Nigel I am tired of your 			****		. You and a few others are retarded, white little 			*****		 who always have something to whine about around me, and it's probably because you are a faggot.    
   
Now who is the real autistic one here? The one speaking reason or the one on a brigade? Honestly. You really need to reevaluate yourself.
Either way, and I'd rather not bring up the whole English thing since it's basically a gaint *********** , but my point still stands, most people who are "phobic" don't fear gays, they hate them. That' is not wrong. It is correct. Fear has nothing to do with it most of the time. That is just political.

Nigel I am tired of your **** . You and a few others are retarded, white little ***** who always have something to whine about around me, and it's probably because you are a faggot.

Now who is the real autistic one here? The one speaking reason or the one on a brigade? Honestly. You really need to reevaluate yourself.
#229 to #228 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
>either way I'm still gonna pretend like I'm not wrong in the face of irrefutable facts
>I'm gonna call you white even though that's not true and has nothing to do with me being wrong

Here's the definition from the Meriam-Webster dictionary, again, since you seem to have trouble reading: "irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or homosexuals." Wow, it's almost like what you are insisting the word doesn't mean is exactly what the accepted definition of it is.

>or the one on a brigade

"a large group of soldiers that is part of an army

: a group of people organized to act together

: a group of people who have the same beliefs"

Oh, I see now, you just suck with the English language. That explains a lot about you actually.
#230 to #229 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
I was referring to you
I was referring to you
#231 to #230 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
If you were referring to just me you definitely didn't use the word correctly then. At least now I have clear evidence of what an autistic dumbass you are, as well as your SJW reasoning, so I never have to take you seriously again.
#232 to #231 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
You really are retarded. The points are going right over your head. You know one of those characteristics of autism? Problems with literal and lateral thinking? Inability to understand metaphors, less linear aspects of reasoning, you know, English? Communication? Might wanna get yourself checked.
User avatar #233 to #232 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
You didn't use metaphors, and your thinking has been entirely linear, and autistic people have issues with being too literal in their thinking, as you exhibited. **** , even when the link you linked to had the exact definition of a word you STILL can't ******* get it correct.

You're trying to pretend like you somehow pulled these fancy mental gymnastics but your entire argument boiled down to "wah I don't care if the dictionary says I'm wrong, it's the one that's wrong!" because you can't accept that a word with "phobia" in it can mean more than fear of that thing. I actually feel kind of bad for you if you're actually delusional enough to buy your own ******** .
User avatar #234 to #233 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
What I said was that most people hate gays not fear them. Even with the definition, this literally changes nothing. Are you ******* familiar with loaded terminology? Not that political ******** even needs a label. I'm only half paying attention to you, but that much is clear.

Dude it literally changes nothing from my original statement. Literally
And you'd be too autistic to know the difference anyway
User avatar #235 to #234 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
"No you ******* retard, homophobia means fear of gays"

Your exact words. Whatever bro, I can tell you're gonna pull the ol' SJW "in the face of being entirely wrong I still lie and insist I'm right" dealio while also trying to dump a lot of ad homs in for added effect, so I'm just gonna stop responding. Clearly you are mentally incapable of realizing when you are wrong.
User avatar #236 to #235 - infinitereaper (04/05/2015) [-]
Original statement still not wrong.
User avatar #237 to #236 - nigeltheoutlaw (04/05/2015) [-]
That's what I expected. Well, at least now I know to just ignore you from now on.
User avatar #218 to #217 - autismo (04/05/2015) [-]
only autismo, thanks
User avatar #214 to #205 - autismo (04/04/2015) [-]
hes about halfway
User avatar #203 to #141 - addmyn (04/04/2015) [-]
Politically correct propaganda is better than none amirite? Ayyyylmao
#12 - fiahhawt (04/04/2015) [-]
But why? And how? Surely it didn't have to escalate to this?
User avatar #15 to #12 - wrpen (04/04/2015) [-]
But it did, comrade.

It didn't have to, no, but there was no stopping it once it started. It could've been stopped, but it wasn't.
User avatar #4 - meringueluka ONLINE (04/03/2015) [-]
that's brilliant. but i just have on issue.

WHY WASN'T I INVITED?
User avatar #9 to #4 - moorgar (04/03/2015) [-]
only because you are a faggot it doesn´t mean that you are homosexual

and you are just a faggot

i love you, no homo
#10 to #9 - meringueluka ONLINE (04/03/2015) [-]
but, i am a homosexual.....
#11 to #10 - moorgar (04/03/2015) [-]
yea sure, keep on trying
#44 to #10 - bilbobagginshield (04/04/2015) [-]
i'm a homosexual too....
i'm a homosexual too....
#131 to #10 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
Why would you be a homosexual, faggot?

JK
#126 - dzimo (04/04/2015) [-]
moral story? men rule lesbians too
#172 - thempc (04/04/2015) [-]
dale's fw the lesbian army arrives
#22 - anon (04/04/2015) [-]
>Ever so slight possibility of threesome in that household
>Can clearly see why he'd want to be single and living there
#157 - naturalsoda (04/04/2015) [-]
staying on topic
#8 - zoowatcher (04/03/2015) [-]
That would be an epic lesson to see.
That would be an epic lesson to see.
User avatar #190 - jokekill (04/04/2015) [-]
I have my reasons to be uncomfortable around some lesbians.
My friends call me Lesbobait because i just look like a femme lesbian apparently.
Every time i go on a night out i get the most scary lesbian grocks coming onto me, and it's always in the girls' toilets too so there's nowhere i can awkwardly escape their advances from. I prefer going places with unisex toilets for this reason alone. Everyone thinks it's hilarious but it really pisses me off.
My friends also love going to gay-town which is also an issue, i feel incredibly uncomfortable going to places that are full of butch lesbos that are on the prowl. I'm like meat to these people.
Whenever i meet someone new it's only a matter of time before they question my sexuality, unless they've met my boyfriend first.
Two lesbians who are gfs though, they're no threat to me.
#191 to #190 - mythael (04/04/2015) [-]
**mythael used "*roll picture*"**
**mythael rolled image**
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