Jimmy's muslim friend. . We got a Muslim friend who is really religious- He Quran backwards. Which is handy ? cause. that' s how Irrhl read it. A surprisingly w
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Jimmy's muslim friend

We got a Muslim friend who is really religious- He Quran backwards.
Which is handy ? cause. that' s how Irrhl read it.
A surprisingly well infer mud and inoffensive jun he the Islamic. faith.
And Quads because I' m not a ******* idiot.
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Views: 41391
Favorited: 50
Submitted: 05/14/2014
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User avatar #19 - payseht (05/15/2014) [-]
Good save. A joke like that can really blow in your face if not careful...
User avatar #26 to #19 - malhaloc ONLINE (05/15/2014) [-]
I bet the audience had a blast listening to him
#30 - givememoarpony (05/15/2014) [-]
i'm quite immature and easily amused, it seems.
#88 - ilikepatatas (05/15/2014) [-]
#86 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
**anonymous rolled image** MFW
User avatar #33 - snood (05/15/2014) [-]
So being offensive to Christians and other religions in every joke is fine, but making offensive comments to Muslims makes you an idiot?
not saying this guy isn't funny but that's a double standard if i've ever seen one.
#34 to #33 - xcoreyx (05/15/2014) [-]
I was thinking the same thing. But I have a feeling there's a part of the joke that we're missing
#44 to #34 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
He is really insulting muslims just not in your typical way.
#39 to #34 - asasinmonkey (05/15/2014) [-]
Its probably cause jimmy is an insult comic. That and maybe he doesnt wanna get blown up.
User avatar #45 to #33 - alanflindt (05/15/2014) [-]
No it's just that he knows if he made a joke about christians and other religions, the likelihood is no one would really give a **** .
If he made a properly offensive joke about muslims, he would probably end up with death threats and get sacked from whoever he was working for for doing so. When you talk **** about islam, you get ****** up, because people are scared of that religion, and rightly so.
#48 to #45 - madpogosticking (05/15/2014) [-]
But he is making fun of Islam by saying he'd be an idiot to make fun of it. So still offensive
User avatar #49 to #48 - alanflindt (05/15/2014) [-]
Yes but in a subtle and very funny way.
#52 to #49 - xxmemosxx (05/15/2014) [-]
British humour in a nut shell, buddy.
User avatar #54 to #33 - doctorhue (05/15/2014) [-]
Then you haven't seen one.
#82 to #33 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
Making offensive comments about muslims is stupid, because they'll kill you if you go against their faith.
User avatar #91 to #33 - MarvelZombie (05/15/2014) [-]
I thought that his point in general was to be above just cheap insult humor
#57 to #33 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
snood didnt get the joke! Lets all point and laugh. HAHAHAHAHAHA
#36 to #33 - pineapplepeople (05/15/2014) [-]
No, he's saying that only dumbasses have to resort to offensive jokes about religion. Islam is just an example in this case. At least that's how I view it.
#47 to #36 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
Sorry to disappoint but that is in no way what he is saying; that's Jimmy Carr he is intentionally offensive to pretty much everyone, he is definitely referencing the whole blowing up people who offend islam thing.
#41 to #33 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
it\s called comon sense, he doesn't want to get blown up.
#35 to #33 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
it's because they're the only ones who blow people up for it, you'd have to be stupid to make fun of someone like that. basically that's what he means.
#38 to #33 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
You really dont know who this is, if you did then you would understand ive heard some of the most offensive muslim and christian joke come from Jimmy Carrs mouth, the only reason this is funny cause everyone expected it to be a properly offensive joke but he turned it around
User avatar #46 to #33 - pykywannabe (05/15/2014) [-]
He was implying he didn't want to be blown the **** up. It was a joke.
User avatar #40 to #33 - iamnuff (05/15/2014) [-]
this isn't a "be PC" joke. this is a "I'm not making fun of the people who might blow me up" joke.
User avatar #109 to #40 - snood (05/15/2014) [-]
oh now i get it
User avatar #28 - klick (05/15/2014) [-]
He's not my favorite comedian, but I still enjoy his work.
#65 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
**acemcgunner rolled image** MFW I see the comments
#8 - anon (05/14/2014) [-]
It doesn't work if you're the one saying it. Instead of an offensive, ignorant idiot, instead you look like a smug, arrogant jackass. Good transition.
#10 to #8 - broorb (05/15/2014) [-]
not what's implied. went straight over your head, mate. keep trying
#1 - yoloswagninegag (05/14/2014) [-]
I would bend that guy over and stuff the qaran in his ass and say allahu ackbar right before he prolapses if you know what I mean
User avatar #87 to #1 - cocoman (05/15/2014) [-]
Is it really you, ********* ?
#92 to #1 - isaacbn ONLINE (05/15/2014) [-]
#96 to #1 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
privoxy this guy is hilarious
#108 to #96 - yoloswagninegag (05/15/2014) [-]
privoxy I'm hilarious apparently
#12 to #1 - phaegitt (05/15/2014) [-]
this is NOT how you use "if you know what i mean" at ALL!
#22 to #1 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
**anonymous rolled image**
User avatar #3 to #1 - huehuehuepster (05/14/2014) [-]
you really tried to put all the cringy things in that username didn't you?

didn't you?!
User avatar #4 to #1 - AmusableBman (05/14/2014) [-]
Why did I read the username as "Yellowswag?"
#31 to #1 - kungfulouie (05/15/2014) [-]
Yolo swag ninegag? Guys, he's not even trying to hide the fact he's trolling.
#85 to #31 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
And what a genius we have here.
User avatar #2 to #1 - pulpunderground (05/14/2014) [-]
I'm not sure I do, could you elaborate?
User avatar #5 to #2 - hokon (05/14/2014) [-]
Muslim, dick in anus, yell muslim, have good feel
User avatar #6 to #5 - pulpunderground (05/14/2014) [-]
Thank you Senpai
#11 - infinitereaper (05/15/2014) [-]
I haves joke about jews   
why jew give money to charity?    
is trick question   
jew don't give away money
I haves joke about jews
why jew give money to charity?
is trick question
jew don't give away money
User avatar #63 to #11 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
with that joke you pissed off jews
User avatar #103 to #63 - infinitereaper (05/15/2014) [-]
people fail to understand
if offended they believe to be true
User avatar #104 to #103 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
it's funny but you don't hate jews right?
#105 to #104 - infinitereaper (05/15/2014) [-]
better question is,   
who does not hate jews?
better question is,
who does not hate jews?

User avatar #106 to #105 - infinitereaper (05/15/2014) [-]
Oh i mess that up, but no,

I'm just attempting to make some humorous humor.
Because I like to believe I'm at least somewhat funny and I do come here to laugh.
User avatar #107 to #106 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
I know right
#7 - anon (05/14/2014) [-]
Yeah, but you are a tax cheating scumbag, so you know. Quid pro quo.
User avatar #56 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
The joke is double set. It has two meanings.

The Muslim Quran and Christian Bible are similar in they both have a beginning that involves a lot of violence and killing of opposing religions, and then they mellow out and tell everyone to be nice to each other at the end.

So if you read it backwards, you get being violent and killing people of opposing religions as the final message.

Which coincidentally seems to be the way a lot of Christians act as well.

Oh look guys, the Muslims and Christians /are/ still on the same page! Haha.

*Please direct all hate towards Veirrian, I am available any time that I am not unavailable. Veirrian is not liable for any tenderness felt in the posterior region of any readers body. Veirrian is not recommended for the following users: Sensitives, Sleeve-Feelers, and your mother. Please use Veirrian responsibly and contact your doctor should any negative side effects occur after use of Veirrian.
User avatar #60 to #56 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
User avatar #89 to #56 - sometoast (05/15/2014) [-]
found the english teacher
#58 to #56 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
no stupid u read arabic from right to left starting on the rightmost page
User avatar #61 to #58 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Congratulations, you just pointed out the other part of the line "The joke is double set. It has two meanings."

I know which way you read Arabic, but, as stated the joke has two, as in one, and then another one, more than just one, but less than three, meanings.
User avatar #64 to #61 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
nope his saying his friend is retarded because it is read backwards and his religious friend didn't do that... which is most likely the joke...
User avatar #66 to #64 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
A joke is all in how you take it, which is why for some people it is funnier than it would be for others. Also until you can formulate some semblance of proper grammatical usage, please stop replying to me. My screen is small, and trying to figure out what you're saying is a pain.
User avatar #67 to #66 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
annnd just like that you are a dick...
User avatar #68 to #67 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
What's your point?
User avatar #71 to #68 - fantasma (05/15/2014) [-]
If you had three dollars, an easy bake oven, and a Jewish prostitute, what would you do?
User avatar #76 to #71 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
**** all 3 things...
User avatar #73 to #71 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Personally, I'd tell the prostitute to eff off, buy some food, and give the easy bake to the lass across the lane.

Regardless, I want the punchline to this joke.
User avatar #77 to #73 - fantasma (05/15/2014) [-]
Oh I'm sorry, there isn't one.
I was just waiting for a Nazi joke or a JEW MONEY joke.
User avatar #78 to #77 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Aww, and here I was hoping for another laugh.
User avatar #80 to #78 - fantasma (05/15/2014) [-]
Well that was the wrong thing.
#79 to #78 - fantasma has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #69 to #68 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
that you shouldn't be mean to random people
User avatar #70 to #69 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Says the person that failed to count to two and called me stupid for it.

Sides, mate, if you don't like mean people, you shouldn't listen to Jimmy Carr.
User avatar #72 to #70 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
I never call others stupid due to the fact that I've heard myself be called that all my life by my step-father and court-less others
User avatar #74 to #72 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Scroll up, and you will see that you did, in fact, call me stupid. It is your first reply.
#100 to #74 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
The curtains are ******* blue.
#93 to #74 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
Thaaat was an anon.
User avatar #75 to #74 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
nope his saying his friend is retarded because it is read backwards and his religious friend didn't do that... which is most likely the joke...
how did I call you a bad name, dude? explain this **** ..
User avatar #97 to #56 - chaossniper (05/15/2014) [-]
this is completly ******** in so many ways it hurts
User avatar #98 to #97 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
The similarities between the Quran and Bible, or the similarities between Muslim extremists(Al Qaeda[Ignores the peaceful teachings in lieu of the outdated violent ones]) and Christians(The asshole ones[Ignores peaceful teachings in lieu of outdated violent ones])?

Or are you supposed to not direct hate towards Veirrian, Veirrian is liable for tenderness of the posterior region, Veirrian is recommended for Sensitives, Sleeve-Feelers and your mother, and you aren't supposed to use Veirrian responsibly?

Cause if you actually take you time to study the majority of religions, you find a number are quite similar, and that a number of them are actually supposed to be about peace and goodwill towards your fellow man. Such as the New Testament of the Christian Bible throwing out the old, and the New Testament is the teachings of Jesus, who taught love and that God views everyone equally.

Yeah, Quran does that too, but no one ever pays attention to that part except for the proper Muslims or people that actually sit down and read more than the first five lines.
User avatar #99 to #98 - chaossniper (05/15/2014) [-]
dude i am muslim and i don't know what are you supposed to say. you're using big words but arent going anywhere
User avatar #101 to #99 - veirianmayne (05/15/2014) [-]
Well, you said something was ******** . So I offered you a few parts in question.
User avatar #13 - moetron (05/15/2014) [-]
You don't read the Qu'ran backwards.. What a pretentious cunt.
User avatar #27 to #13 - spyisspy (05/15/2014) [-]
im ******* Christian and i thumbed this **** down...
#81 to #27 - clitpearl (05/15/2014) [-]
You ******* your hand or an actual person called Christian?
User avatar #62 to #27 - acemcgunner (05/15/2014) [-]
no no no don't give a bad name to us and Jesus, it's jokes.. I am sure they don't mean anything by it..
#29 to #13 - lionti (05/15/2014) [-]
Good evening ladies and gentlemen this is Lionti reporting live once again for FunnyJunk news. In tonight's top story, Moetron, a simple man trying to share his simple opinion but simply ****** up. Our story starts when Mr Moetron saw a post that contained a joke from stand up comedian Jimmy Carr, upon finishing reading the joke Mr Moetron quickly become disgruntled. On lookers were shocked when Mr Moetron removed his trousers and shouted "You don't read the Qur'an backwards..What a pretentious cunt". One on looker Mr Ruspanic came to the scene and tried to explain the joke but failed as Mr Moetron became even more disgruntled. Another community member ABStheGenius came to Ruspanic's aid by telling Mr Moetron "Bro, chill out" ABStheGenius then continued to explain how the joke was misinterpreted but to little effect. Police are yet to be called to the scene but other community members don't want to get involved in fear of possible red thumbs. I will be staying on the scene live keeping you updated as this shocking story unfolds. This is Lionti reporting live for FunnyJunk news. Good evening
#37 to #29 - neoexdeath ONLINE (05/15/2014) [-]
And on the weather, we've got a front of green thumbs coming in, followed by a solid blast of Red hitting down on the Brony Spammer pretty damn hard. People in that area are advised to go out with umbrellas, or some quality OC to keep themselves dry, because its just a downpour!
#32 to #29 - Ruspanic (05/15/2014) [-]
I... I made the news?
User avatar #14 to #13 - Ruspanic (05/15/2014) [-]
Arabic text (like Hebrew) is read right to left and their books are bound on the right side, so from an English-speaker's perspective it would look like you're reading the book backwards.
User avatar #16 to #14 - moetron (05/15/2014) [-]
But it's not backwards. That's how you actually read it. The dude in the content contradicted himself while coming off as a condescending dick.
#21 to #16 - ABStheGenius (05/15/2014) [-]
Bro, chill out, in the perspective of someone who reads English it is backwards. Just like for a person who reads Arabic english would be backwards. I'm a Muslim and I dont find that offensive and, honestly, Muslims who take small non-insulting jokes too seriously are really annoying. Islam doesnt stop you from laughing or telling a joke, as long as it is not offensive or a flat out lie.
User avatar #17 to #16 - Ruspanic (05/15/2014) [-]
I feel like you missed the joke. The joke is that you can't tell offensive jokes about Islam because it'll get you killed. Are you seriously offended by him saying that the Quran is read backwards? That's like the least offensive thing he's ever said. Jesus, mate.
Jimmy Carr's whole brand of comedy is based on telling the most offensive jokes possible.
User avatar #18 to #17 - moetron (05/15/2014) [-]
How will telling jokes about Islam get you killed? And no, I am not offended by him saying the Qu'ran is read backwards, but how rude and pretentious he seems afterwards.
User avatar #20 to #18 - Ruspanic (05/15/2014) [-]
Didn't you hear about the Danish cartoonist who got killed for drawing Muhammad?
User avatar #23 to #20 - moetron (05/15/2014) [-]
User avatar #24 to #23 - Ruspanic (05/15/2014) [-]
Sorry, looks like he wasn't killed but survived numerous murder attempts. He's now under constant police protection.

But Theo van Gogh was killed for making a documentary critical of Islam, and it seems like every time someone makes a video or statement criticizing Islam, Muslims riot and burn **** and kill people. That's what the joke was referring to.
#42 to #18 - clitpearl (05/15/2014) [-]
Muslims have a complete lack of humour where their faith is concerned. In muslim countries under Sharia law, taking the piss will get you stoned to death.
#83 to #42 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
plz stop da generalizing

Anyways, not very much different to Christian Europe 1000 years ago
User avatar #94 to #83 - clitpearl (05/15/2014) [-]
Okay, name ONE country that has Sharia law where you can make fun of Islam and the peadophile prophet Mohamed and not be put to death.
#25 to #16 - anon (05/15/2014) [-]
Shut the hell up and learn to take a joke you ******* jackass.

It's a joke not a dick so don't take it so hard.
#51 to #25 - kureizikitsune (05/15/2014) [-]
Here, bro, have this.
User avatar #53 to #16 - doctorhue (05/15/2014) [-]
You're coming off as a condescending dick right now
#102 - mathmanchris (05/15/2014) [-]
Smoke Quaran, get stoned.
User avatar #95 - definitelynotarab (05/15/2014) [-]
Which is funny because arabic is read right to left :')
User avatar #90 - flibstaar (05/15/2014) [-]
Ha ha ha ha HAAH.
#84 - rottenrelish (05/15/2014) [-]
I really love when people have to explain a joke it really makes a joke better.

“Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog. You understand it better but the frog dies in the process.”

― E.B. White
tags: humour
#111 to #84 - kameken ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
People who try to get humor down to a science are the ones who understand it least of all.
#43 - nikkicj has deleted their comment [-]
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