Heart of a Norse Giant. . The " heart eta Hines giant. Wt' iife ageing his: lanteus: grandfather' s after his: passing in 133?. h' Lars ", this It appears: he h
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Heart of a Norse Giant

The " heart eta Hines giant.
Wt' iife ageing his: lanteus: grandfather' s after his:
passing in 133?. h' Lars ", this It
appears: he have been passed hem be within his:
fer hundreds: The and whate' -rm that
gees with it has been lest he = ages.
The an = ::: is: written in rule i“ -Jers: e runes and reads:
Within this mt lies = heart ofthe 'em and terrible I iant
...
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Submitted: 11/17/2013
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Comments(126):

[ 126 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#1 - sevasevol (11/17/2013) [-]
better see what properties it has
User avatar #110 to #1 - OsamaBinLadenz (11/18/2013) [-]
Only the Dovahkiin would have the balls to put bees, toes, and hearts in his mouth.
#2 to #1 - yoursandwitch ONLINE (11/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#89 to #2 - missions (11/18/2013) [-]
Source?
User avatar #99 to #89 - niggernazi (11/18/2013) [-]
terminator
#100 to #99 - missions (11/18/2013) [-]
Thanks!
#9 - derpmageddon (11/18/2013) [-]
To anyone wondering, this is not real. It's a model made by fourrpaws on deviantArt, with a fictional story added to it for effect. The picture and story just gets passed around on various places on the internets from time to time. Here's a link to the work on deviantArt, and if you read the comments, you will see that many people thought it was real at first by how well it was made. Picture slightly related.

User avatar #21 to #9 - turdburgalar (11/18/2013) [-]
Well no ******* **** it's not real.
#104 to #9 - chupiter (11/18/2013) [-]
Where's the link?
#118 to #104 - derpmageddon (11/18/2013) [-]
You need to login to view this link

Trying this again. I know i posted the link with the comment, i even triple checked that it went to the right page. Anyways, if I or funnyjunk ***** up again just google "Lars Sigerson" and it should be the first results.
#33 - thunderxcatsxhoooo (11/18/2013) [-]
Skyrim: A true story
User avatar #41 to #33 - theincorrigibleone (11/18/2013) [-]
But giant's don't have hearts...
They only have toes.
User avatar #43 to #41 - thunderxcatsxhoooo (11/18/2013) [-]
you clever bastard you.
#44 to #43 - theincorrigibleone (11/18/2013) [-]
made this just for you sorry it took me so long, had to re-install gimp
#57 to #44 - coookiecrisp (11/18/2013) [-]
For some reason, that image terrifies me.
Makes me think of the Thumb-thumbs....
#49 to #44 - dblej ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
Dungeon Giant anyone?
#6 - fatalhermit (11/17/2013) [-]
i'd be interested to see a scientist do a dna analysis on it, could lead to interesting discoveries
#111 to #6 - anon (11/18/2013) [-]
It's fake

Your DNA analysis would come up inconclusive, as there's no DNA to be found

dumb ****
I bet you believe in the loch ness monster too
User avatar #7 to #6 - mankey (11/17/2013) [-]
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_of_Castelnau

Giants have already been proved to have existed. Caused by gigantism.

Interesting fact: In the story of David and Goliath, Goliath was thought to have had Gigantism, which caused a tumor to develop in his head, causing pressure in his brain behind his eyes. That gave him tunnel vision and meant he couldn't see David with the sling and it ruptured when he was hit in the head with a stone making him bleed out.
#24 to #7 - thatonenerd (11/18/2013) [-]
Although completely plausible, a slightly simpler explanation is that Goliath had gigantism, and David was able to kill him because he was skilled with a very deadly ranged weapon. Most people read the story and think "Oh, it has to be divine intervention because he killed a giant with a slingshot," but they overlook the lethality of the ancient sling. Greek and Roman military surgery manuals were incomplete with out suggestions on how to remove sling-shot from inside the human body, and in ancient times slingers were viewed as far more dangerous than archerers. So its is completely reasonable that a sling could put a rock through someones head.
#73 to #24 - zendir (11/18/2013) [-]
What they dont tell kids it that he stabs Goliath in the heart and cuts off his head after he is knocked out by the sling
What they dont tell kids it that he stabs Goliath in the heart and cuts off his head after he is knocked out by the sling
#12 to #7 - captainstinkypinky (11/18/2013) [-]
That's actually the most interesting thing I've seen today (about David and Goliath). I didn't know that
User avatar #61 to #12 - threeeighteen (11/18/2013) [-]
Do you usually study about David and Goliath daily?
User avatar #125 to #61 - captainstinkypinky (11/18/2013) [-]
No, I haven't at all, actually. But that seems like an interesting explanation to the story
User avatar #87 to #7 - unculturedswine (11/18/2013) [-]
Saying that Goliath couldn't see David completely ignores the fact that Goliath was standing there taunting him. Also, saying he bled out because of a supposed tumor in his brain is irrelevant because David cut off Goliath's head with his own sword while he was lying there, which I would feel safe in assuring happened long before he bled out.
User avatar #88 to #87 - mankey (11/18/2013) [-]
Going for full realism, a seasoned warrior would not take his eyes off of his enemy, even if he was a boy. Let alone allow him to load, spin and release a rock from a sling without either attacking first or blocking it with a shield. The tunnel vision meant he couldn't see the boy or dodge/block any incoming projectiles until it was too late.

Of course we'd never know exactly what happened because we only really have one source of reference and it's, shall we say, spotty at best. I'm just giving a scenario which could give it a basis in reality. As they say, all myths and legends have some grain of truth to start it.
User avatar #91 to #88 - unculturedswine (11/18/2013) [-]
Goliath was there with a spear, a javelin, a sword and his shield bearer. He was the champion of the entire Philistine army; and he had a whole other army too terrified to even come face him. So when a teenager strides up wearing no armour and only armed with a stick and a strap of leather, you can damn well better believe he's going to be rather cocky about it.
And since you pointed out that he wasn't taking his eyes off David, then his shield wouldn't be covering his head, where he was hit. And the Israeli slingshot was comparable to a bow, hurling 2" to 3" rocks at 200 feet per second, with an impact force of 5000 foot pounds.
I don't know the range, but the only things he had that could counter attack at the distance David would have been at to stop him firing would be his spear and javelin, both one shot weapons compared to David having a pouch full of stones. And knowing the result he obviously didn't get his shield up in time to block.
David was also a Benjaminite, a tribe so renowned for their skill with the slingshot they were said to be able to sling a stone at a hair and not miss.

Tl;dr Goliath was a cocky asshole, David was proficient in a weapon that could, and often did, penetrate armour and flesh. And then he cut off his head.
User avatar #94 to #91 - mankey (11/18/2013) [-]
Without getting into an argument about whether the Bible is literal or not, the thing is we don't have an accurate account. People love to embellish stories of heroism and the underdog winning out. So we don't know exactly who Goliath or David was to their armies. They could both have been conscripted slaves, sent out to give the troops a performance before the battle, then they built up the story afterwards.

The basic facts we can draw from the story, if any of it is to be believed, is Goliath was a giant of a man, David was his opponent and Goliath died from a slung stone to the head. Those were the basis I used for my hypothesis.

The location it happened, the circumstances leading up to the battle and what happened afterwards could be distorted beyond any any true recognisable facts.
User avatar #27 to #7 - jakuhlope (11/18/2013) [-]
DO I BELIEVE YOU OR COMMENT 9?!
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
User avatar #39 to #27 - ktom (11/18/2013) [-]
You could believe both, seeing as #9 just says the original picture is a hoax, not giantism in general
#11 to #7 - mayoroftownsville ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
Or maybe it's a made up story
User avatar #16 to #11 - obsidicus (11/18/2013) [-]
It could be, but I read it in my neuroscience textbook as well so I think the story has some credibility.
#17 to #16 - mayoroftownsville ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
Neuroscientists: Experts on Biblical Historicity since 1492
User avatar #13 to #11 - captainstinkypinky (11/18/2013) [-]
(Or that)
#19 to #7 - utasco (11/18/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #51 to #7 - unncommon (11/18/2013) [-]
I saw on Deadliest Warrior where one group used the sling and that determined that it could in fact deal a killing blow.
That bitch ****** up the skull it was cash as **** .
#45 - infinitereaper (11/18/2013) [-]
Do you guys ever wonder that maybe fables and myths (Yeah I know shut up) just maybe might have been real?
And all the magic and lore of the world simply... died off... never to be seen again?

We would never even know.
That all that wonder in the world had died off like the melting of fallen snow.
User avatar #46 to #45 - knightman (11/18/2013) [-]
i wonder that aswell my friend
User avatar #66 to #45 - beamersmack **User deleted account** (11/18/2013) [-]
Who knows what was around 6000 years ago.
User avatar #70 to #66 - kanatana (11/18/2013) [-]
According to Christians, not a whole lot.
User avatar #71 to #70 - beamersmack **User deleted account** (11/18/2013) [-]
Good thing I'm an Autobot worshiper. All hail Omega Prime.
User avatar #74 to #71 - kanatana (11/18/2013) [-]
ALL HAIL UNICRON
User avatar #120 to #70 - wishingwell (11/18/2013) [-]
i thought the world was 8000 years old according to hardcore-christians?

- 6000 years, 2000 years ago
User avatar #119 to #45 - wishingwell (11/18/2013) [-]
I really like the fables comic for this exact reason..
User avatar #75 to #45 - thedarkestrogue (11/18/2013) [-]
Magic = Science.
#48 to #45 - amuzen (11/18/2013) [-]
sort of like the world just slowly transitions from genre/aesthetic to genre/aesthetic and now we're getting into the gritty stage between industrial revolution/steampunk and space tech.
User avatar #50 to #48 - infinitereaper (11/18/2013) [-]
yeah something like that, not sure if we're going to transition to anything nice though considering.
#90 to #50 - amuzen (11/18/2013) [-]
Well if you think about just about every genre has a good and a bad side so chances are the world would be a strange amalgamation of pollution apocalypse like in fist of the north star, a Utopia for few with super advanced technology like the Axiom from Wall-e, and a sort of futuristic parody of our modern world like Futurama living between the two.
#54 to #45 - quiescat (11/18/2013) [-]
i think that a quote from the first men in black movie applies here.
'A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.'
what where once called Demon is now called disease. there is no telling how many storys where made up along the way to explain something we know for fact now. i do wonder of all the myths and monsters to "die" off. why do they all have unlikely powers that sound like that would make it much easier to survive. i think if there are any real monsters of old where/are just us.
User avatar #55 to #54 - infinitereaper (11/18/2013) [-]
Yeah but I like to wonder. Perhaps I still have a faint hope that this world isn't as cold, empty and harsh as it seems to be. The more I look at and live in reality the more disappointed I am.
#59 to #55 - quiescat (11/18/2013) [-]
then good sir i think you might be missing out on just how much fantastic crap there is out there. humans are fairly **** but have there moments from time to time. the world and universe we live in however has more wonder then a baby vomiting unicorns (which sadly i cant seem to find a quick google image of)
User avatar #60 to #59 - infinitereaper (11/18/2013) [-]
Yeah but I have bad health, am poor, am unexceptional, and have bad luck in general. Not to mention the chronic pain/sickness. Life isn't very fun for me.
#62 to #60 - quiescat (11/18/2013) [-]
that sucks man. chance are you have seen this one but i think it applies
#107 to #60 - anon (11/18/2013) [-]
TOUGH TITTIES
LIFE ISN'T FAIR
User avatar #4 - lightninghorse (11/17/2013) [-]
i need a size reference
User avatar #5 to #4 - Shramin ONLINE (11/17/2013) [-]
assuming the edges of the box is a little over a centimeter thick that makes the heart 7 or 8 CM wide and 12 or 13 tall.
#106 - dinonator (11/18/2013) [-]
that would probably smell great
that would probably smell great
User avatar #113 to #106 - theviusking (11/18/2013) [-]
Like lavender perhaps.
#105 - anon (11/18/2013) [-]
I think it's quite rude to make source unavailable to non-registered.
Honestly, that's the first thing that everybody should be able to see.

I don't care about the commenting or the stupid item game. Just let me see where the image comes from. It's your duty.
User avatar #123 to #105 - skeptical (11/18/2013) [-]
thing is, with this, it's not even available to the registered
User avatar #22 - ipartywithpedobear (11/18/2013) [-]
i wonder how large King Og's heart was
User avatar #81 - greyshirt ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
Should've put something next to it to compare it's size.
User avatar #82 to #81 - kalima ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
If he did that he might not be able to take the picture.
User avatar #58 - mrgoodlove (11/18/2013) [-]
This is somewhat terrifying but also kinda awesome
User avatar #28 - callan (11/18/2013) [-]
I'll believe its size when the photo has something commonplace to help scale its size.
#35 to #28 - rprzombie (11/18/2013) [-]
This image has expired
You mean like straw?


Its tiny, that's the real reason they say its mummified, mummified things are dehydrated and tiny versions of what they once were. Hence the "giant" heart is now the size of a fist. Probably just a leather replica based on the size/shape of a horse heart.
#53 to #35 - tragicrhapsody ONLINE (11/18/2013) [-]
Rex Ryan approved
User avatar #36 to #35 - callan (11/18/2013) [-]
I don't know about you, but most straw I've seen can vary in size and thickness. I want something uniform that doesn't change like, say, a ruler.
#38 to #36 - rprzombie (11/18/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Something uniform that doesn't change like, say, a ruler.


yes, it still says cm and mm on it
User avatar #40 to #38 - callan (11/18/2013) [-]
Here's a shocker, something can say cm and mm on it without being accurate.
#42 to #40 - rprzombie (11/18/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Th-thats not my point or anything b-baka......
#14 - italianchef (11/18/2013) [-]
have your (future) wife try to eat it to see if the children will be strong
have your (future) wife try to eat it to see if the children will be strong
#10 - sparkspirit (11/18/2013) [-]
If it was real, I can only imagine the stench.
User avatar #15 to #10 - rhc (11/18/2013) [-]
if i remember right, mummified things don't stink
#20 to #15 - anon (11/18/2013) [-]
Ok.
#18 - freenarative (11/18/2013) [-]
This is BS and here is the simple reason why. I make jerky. As do many others. And if you ask any one who does this what will CONSIDERABLY shorten the shelf life of jerky, it's fat. this "preserved" heart has fat on it. the yellowy stuff on its top half. That means this is no more than 3-6 weeks old. Sorry, but it's BS
#63 - yorker (11/18/2013) [-]
What if all of the magic and mythology was real but humans were cut off from using it for being assholes like the Yuzzhan-Vong in Star Wars?
User avatar #83 to #63 - bobbybeats (11/18/2013) [-]
When I first heard new Star Wars movies, I thought yuzhaan vong
User avatar #68 to #63 - kanatana (11/18/2013) [-]
Iunderstoodthatreference.gif
User avatar #72 to #68 - yorker (11/18/2013) [-]
**** yeah, Star Wars references.
User avatar #76 to #72 - kanatana (11/18/2013) [-]
the New Jedi Order books were some of my favorites when I was a kid. The Han Solo trilogy was epic as well. Ever read Darksaber?
User avatar #97 - shemaledong (11/18/2013) [-]
The straw looks pretty fresh to me
User avatar #108 to #97 - feedtehtrollz (11/18/2013) [-]
you can tell by the colouring as well as the curvature, it's quite old
#85 - anon (11/18/2013) [-]
looks like a horse heart to me. Also that wouldn't make the writing untrue.
User avatar #121 to #85 - trainverse (11/18/2013) [-]
what if it was a fierce and terrible slightly-larger-than-the-average-horse horse?
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