Gaben angry, Gaben use logic. I really hope that dorkly just made this up. Because otherwise y'all just dun goof'd big time. It, Let' s Talk About 3 by Gabe Neu oh he Mad
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Gaben angry, Gaben use logic

Gaben angry, Gaben use logic. I really hope that dorkly just made this up. Because otherwise y'all just dun goof'd big time. It, Let' s Talk About 3 by Gabe Neu

I really hope that dorkly just made this up. Because otherwise y'all just dun goof'd big time

Tags: oh | he | Mad
**** It, Let' s Talk About 3
by Gabe Neural. Confounded and Managing Director of Value
Hey Friends,
Last week, Valve made three very important announcements
regarding our ongoing goal to create the best possible gaming
experience for Steam users everywhere - a variety of new
products and services that would help bring PC gaming to
living room TVs.
We at Valve are trying to pioneer a new age of innovation in
the gaming world, where old ideas still rule and stagnant
practices have ground progress to a halt. Gamers have leng
held us up as a testament to the power of challenging gaming
dogma, a company that isn' t afraid of taking the riskier path
and not simply resting on their murals, like Activision has
done for long with their yearly Call of Duty games.
You loved Valve for being something different.
And, of course, yen slobbering are bitching that
we didn' t announce an FPS sequel.
That' s seems to be all I hear about these days. “Hey, you
know that series your company created that broke the mold of
first person shooters and was hailed as a unique, in negative
take en the genre'? Pump cut more sequels to that."
Listen, I get it - yeu' re invested in the story and we left off en a
cliffhanger. A cliffhanger that fallowed some other cliffhangers
that will probably lead to more cliffhangers. A cliffhanger to a
story about a mute who fights a bunch of
aliens and gets caught up in weird interdimensional battle. I
can understand why yeu' re invested - it' s a wellywood story
as literary and moving as Te Kill a Mockingbird, except with a
plot where Scout couldn' t talk for seem reasen and
kept smashing **** with a crowbar.
It' s definitely not the inventive gameplay and generation-
defining mechanics that made the games m memorable,
right? Because, if that were the case. you wouldn 't care about
another sequel - we' d be concerned with whether or not
Valve was continuing to innovate the industry. Youll be
wondering if we were pushing the bou dearies of conventional
gaming. ‘r' ' d be wondering if we were trying new things and
thinking bigger than "Gee, I wonder what new, inexplicable
race of aliens Gordon Freeman is gen ea hurl garbage at with
a gravity gun this time.”
Because - hey! - it' d be ED stupid for us to strive to improve
the entire gaming ecosystem, especially when we cerld be
making a single shooter videogame. It' d be a waste of time for
us to take huge risks to provide a bigger platform for PC
gaming, which will intern encourage all game makers to
produce new and interesting games that will be more
accessible than ever. Why encourage all developers to create
their ewe games as challenging to the status que as
was at the time, especially when we could make boatloads of
cash with 3'?
After all, don' t you "hardcore gamers" just kwe developers
who are ruled by greed and puke out sequels to popular
shooters instead of exploring new avenues of gaming?
ISN' T THAT WHAT YOU LOVE?
It' s almost as if we just want us to come out with mere
sequels that lack the sort of surprise that semes with new,
original games. It' s almost as if youve comfortable with a
known property and don' t want to challenge yourself with new
types of games. its almost as if you just want us to be mere
like Activision and EA.
You want 3'? You got it. We' ll put cut a new
every year. They' ll be . They' ll have to reelect to
Facebook to play. They' ll have assloads of day one BUS.
They' ll have goddamn microtransactions.
Yew] be living yew worst nightmare. We' ll be speechless.
Yen?! be living .
GAMAN OUT
...
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Views: 24505
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Submitted: 10/01/2013
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Comments(86):

[ 86 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #21 - sinclairr (10/01/2013) [-]
I still want Team Counter Portal Episode 3

seriously, I'm not dying for HL3 but they ended episode two with the worst cliffhanger. End a series with a "What if?" or "What about this?" cliffhanger, not "So a really important person's dead, the the winning battle's in our hands, and there's still a lot to learn about this universe but **** you -roll credits"
User avatar #57 to #21 - hugsta ONLINE (10/02/2013) [-]
Why not call it "orange box 2", just to keep the joke running a little longer?
User avatar #6 - thatguyyoumightno (10/01/2013) [-]
Sure, I wish they released Half Life 3 (or episode 3, or whatever) as much as anyone, because I want to know what happens after Episode 2. But that's not the only reason I want to play it.
(Spoilers for anyone who has yet to play one of the greatest franchises of all time.)
Episode 2 announced that Gordon and Alyx will be travelling to a snow-covered wasteland to find the Borealis, an Aperture Science research vessel. Aperture Science was the prominent setting for the Portal series, a series that revolutionized the puzzle genre with it's mechanics.
What I am waiting for is Valve to make a game that combines these two series; the story and fast-paced gameplay of Half Life with the mechanics of Portal. Am I saying that I want to see Gordon Freeman using a portal gun? No, but Aperture Science is such a large corporation that they no doubt have more inventions that they stashed on the Borealis. It would be a good reason for both the Combine and the Rebellion to want control of it. Something like a Handheld Turret, or a Mobile Thermal Discouragement Beam, Aperture styled versions of some of the Half Life weapons, High Energy Pellet Launchers. With the possibilities of Aperture in the hands of a team like Valve, the ideas are almost limitless.
If I simply wanted to find out what happened after Episode 2, I would wait for a movie. Valve has said they are interested in creating their own movie, and if their fans only want to see an Epilogue to Episode 2, Half Life 3 is the perfect idea to start, and leave the games to the genre-defining ideas that they are known for.
#14 to #6 - SpankThePanda ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
what if Chell is the daughter of Gordon and Alyx? Like Gordon and Alyx had a child but the combine were still around at the time so they sent her to aperture so she would be safe. I have more to say on that subject but I don't feel like typing it.
User avatar #43 to #6 - ompalomper (10/01/2013) [-]
what if they made it so that both campaigns take place in the same area and run parallel with each other? chell and doctor freeman working together across the areas of the ship.

and to truly make people happy, make a co-op campaign that can be played from both the half life game and the portal game. like, you get an extra short game with the ordinary game.

maybe im just rambling but there are may ways they could make this epic conclusion awesome. maybe they will just make a half life game with a group of rebels finding chell and she agrees to help dr freeman with breaking into the borealis
#8 to #6 - samael (10/01/2013) [-]
>Handheld Turret

i.e. a gun
User avatar #9 to #8 - thatguyyoumightno (10/01/2013) [-]
1. It would be an actual handheld turret. Personality and everything.
2. It's Aperture. They need long complex names for everything...
User avatar #41 to #9 - ompalomper (10/01/2013) [-]
so a TALKING gun
User avatar #84 to #41 - KillinTime (10/02/2013) [-]
That automatically detects enemies, aims within a certain scope and fires accordingly, without user input.

"I'm different"
#22 - infiniteight (10/01/2013) [-]
Half Life 3 IS confirmed. valve filed for trademark for HL3 (a few hours ago). it goes away in 6 months if not used or extended. it can be extended up to 3 years. HL3 is confirmed at latest for 3 years, but probably within 6 months time.

www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=688589

You need to login to view this link

#82 to #22 - anon (10/02/2013) [-]
That doesn't mean confirmed. It means they're considering it. Shut up.
#63 to #39 - infiniteight (10/02/2013) [-]
but many still do not believe. We must spread the word, lest random users get laughed at for learning about it late. We cant have that now
User avatar #85 to #63 - skilletpanhead (10/02/2013) [-]
True. It still is good that they're going to release it soon. (3-5 years, at the max. That's when the Trademark will expire.)
#70 - abachonk (10/02/2013) [-]
I read Battletoads of cash...
#10 - taurusman (10/01/2013) [-]
im probably going to be red thumbed to hell for this but i personally don't want half-life 3. while the game was great and a cliff hanger that has to have an ending sometime, i feel as though the wait has been too long, just like duke nukem, after a while our expectations have got to much, Gabe could bring out some hing that could make our eyes burn with glory but we'd still go "meh, not worth the wait"
#32 to #10 - commit (10/01/2013) [-]
as long as there's enough hype it'll get praise.
User avatar #48 to #10 - srskate (10/02/2013) [-]
November 19, 1998
Half-Life, Release date

November 14, 2004
Half-Life 2, Release date

Search Results

October 10, 2007
Half-Life 2: Episode Two, Release date


Comparatively, it hasn't been that long. Also, it isn't really risky to agree with the content.
User avatar #13 - adu ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
This article was written almost as if Portal 2 wasn't released only two years ago with day-one microntransaction DLC.

Valve does some cool **** but they're far from sinless, so pretending that finishing off a loved series that has actual plot continuity would be a step backwards for them would pretty much be ******** . Look at TF2 for ****** sake. I'd rather have them making games that people enjoy than hats.
User avatar #53 to #13 - trivdiego (10/02/2013) [-]




i enjoy hats
#68 - helenwheels (10/02/2013) [-]
Because makeing a profit is evil.   
Because wanting to finish a story line is petty.   
Because there's no possible way you can be innovative with a already started story line.   
Because gaben actually said this.   
Because hits to half-life 3 haven't already been dropped in portal 2.
Because makeing a profit is evil.
Because wanting to finish a story line is petty.
Because there's no possible way you can be innovative with a already started story line.
Because gaben actually said this.
Because hits to half-life 3 haven't already been dropped in portal 2.
User avatar #56 - itemexchange (10/02/2013) [-]
they dont want more of it because of any reason than they want to know how it ends
he left on a cliff hanger if he had ended the series right out they wouldnt beg so damn much
#1 - konradkurze (10/01/2013) [-]
yeah, some people want HL3 they'd take some mainstreams **** just to tell themselves they have HL3

god forbid they ******* wait till Valve develops a new way to add some zing to gaming again
#12 to #1 - include (10/01/2013) [-]
Here take this.
#75 - messerauditore (10/02/2013) [-]
I don't give a **** about the Half Life series and I only want HL3 to come out so I don't have to see the confirmed jokes every ******* day anymore.
#80 to #75 - gamechap ONLINE (10/02/2013) [-]
Once HL3 comes out the /only/ thing you're going to see are confirmed jokes
Once HL3 comes out the /only/ thing you're going to see are confirmed jokes
User avatar #72 - thebacondroid (10/02/2013) [-]
You had me at three announcements
#62 - IamSofaKingdom (10/02/2013) [-]
Well then release a new and innovative Half-Life as the third installment instead of hashing out the same thing. Pretty sure most people are invested in the game that was a breath of fresh air ten years ago and really just want a good conclusion to it.
Well then release a new and innovative Half-Life as the third installment instead of hashing out the same thing. Pretty sure most people are invested in the game that was a breath of fresh air ten years ago and really just want a good conclusion to it.
#45 - blueninja (10/01/2013) [-]
MFW that last part   
I have been so patient and I would gladly wait a few more years for the right time for that game
MFW that last part
I have been so patient and I would gladly wait a few more years for the right time for that game
#7 - pentol (10/01/2013) [-]
as anyone who follows valve somewhat closely knows, their employees work on whatever project they feel is the best place for them to be right then and there. so if they feel that the best they can do right now is making L4D3, they will do that. if they want to make hats for dota, they do that. if they feel they should make stuff for the livingroom, they do that.
the reason the aren't/weren't/won't make HL3 is because they don't feel like it
User avatar #55 - severepwner ONLINE (10/02/2013) [-]
Gee it's almost like we want you to finish a series you made to tie this up. Sure it's an old game, but you can't just stop. If you're going to leave a game on a cliffhanger, especially when it's a good game, you need to finish it. That's just what being a story teller is. You can't just drop your responsibility just because you don't think it's a good game.
#18 - serotonin (10/01/2013) [-]
soooo if everyone wants to gave HL3 for plot maybe they should trow us a curve ball and make a movie/movies!?
HALF LIFE 3 episode 1 and 2. We get Freeman speaking, we get movie with Alex, Dog , G man, Doc Clainer etc. Awesome, smart SF movie with a ton of cool action.

...just a tought.
User avatar #23 to #18 - validlikesalad ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
It would make sense since HL2 and e1 and 2 didn't have cutscenes, so HL3 should be nothing but one big cutscene. A movie.
#27 to #18 - kosthe (10/01/2013) [-]
with Morgan Freeman as Eli Vance
User avatar #88 to #18 - KillinTime (10/16/2013) [-]
gordon is not allowed to talk, that's his thing
User avatar #64 - TheRealFinland (10/02/2013) [-]
i don't care about half-life honestly i just love the joke
#81 - zionsype (10/02/2013) [-]
>Comparing Half-Life to "To Kill a Mocking Bird"
To kill a mocking bird is ******* terrible. All that happens is that a white lawyer defends a black guy who is falsely accused of rape because the white girl he ****** has a racist dad, then the dad kills the black guy and tries to kill the lawyers kids for literally NO ******* REASON. SERIOUSLY, HE WON, HE GOT THE GUY KILLED. HE EVEN SPIT IN THE LAWYERS FACE. THIS ACTION HELPED HIM IN NO WAY. But suddenly, "Bo Radly" AKA monster man from beginning of book that had no ******* effect in the story until now, just happens to be outside for the first time ever, right where the kids are, and saves them. The end.

Also, are we really supposed to believe a totally white family back then would have names like "Atticus" "Scout" and "Jem"
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