Fucking Texas. .. Its so hot in Texas, we're lucky if Hell opens up and send us a cool breeze.
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Comments(415):

[ 415 comments ]
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#64 - include (12/17/2013) [-]
Ya'll can't say nutin' bad about Texas.
#364 to #64 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
you just had to include this reference
#263 to #64 - hammarhead (12/18/2013) [-]
nuttin'
User avatar #266 to #263 - include (12/18/2013) [-]
oh you.
#91 - slenderwolf (12/17/2013) [-]
Its so hot in Texas, we're lucky if Hell opens up and send us a cool breeze.
#388 to #91 - imagebandetector (12/18/2013) [-]
It was snowing here in Texas less than 2 weeks ago.
User avatar #261 to #91 - hammarhead (12/18/2013) [-]
you've clearly never been to florida. There's a good chance it'll be 80 on christmas.
User avatar #381 to #261 - wizardblizzard (12/18/2013) [-]
If you think 80F is hot at Christmas, you've clearly never experienced Austalian summer.
#390 to #381 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
being 40 degrees right now i can confirm this
(aka 105f)
User avatar #410 to #381 - hammarhead (12/18/2013) [-]
but it's supposed to be winter here

in summer, it gets in the 100's, and it's always hurricaney with a chance of mosquitoes
User avatar #255 to #91 - greenstrongworld (12/18/2013) [-]
Hell, everyone in Texas goes to heaven because damn son, Hell don't want none o' your hot **** .
User avatar #269 to #91 - srostination (12/18/2013) [-]
....its ******* 35 here in houston.
#355 to #269 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
35 WHAT? 35 WHAAAAAAT?
User avatar #357 to #355 - srostination (12/18/2013) [-]
35 degrees Fahrenheit .
#300 to #269 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
35. . .
#94 - williamzanziger (12/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#92 - slenderwolf (12/17/2013) [-]
Texas is so flat that when your dog runs away you can watch him run away for three days.
User avatar #159 to #92 - CHUCKNORRiO (12/18/2013) [-]
And then Kansas is where you see him until he runs into a tornado
#272 to #159 - dieterkaiser ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#108 - hitbyadriveby (12/17/2013) [-]
looks like my pubes
#197 - LocoJoe (12/18/2013) [-]
Get rekt faggots!
Get rekt faggots!
#75 - roliga (12/17/2013) [-]
Don't get me wrong I love Texas and all but I don't get why everyone refers to it as the gun state when openly carrying a handgun there is illegal, while it's legal in many other states like Arizona, New Mexico, Georgia, Florida, etc.
User avatar #76 to #75 - kupowrath (12/17/2013) [-]
Uh, you can open carry if you have a license.
User avatar #79 to #76 - roliga (12/17/2013) [-]
No, you can not open carry a handgun in the state of Texas, it's a felony...
User avatar #81 to #79 - kupowrath (12/17/2013) [-]
Hmm. I guess people just do it anyways. I work in a convenience store and I see about.. 10 people a day with a gun on their hip. (not concealed)
#82 to #81 - roliga (12/17/2013) [-]
I really don't believe you because that is a five year sentence and a $5,000 fine
User avatar #85 to #82 - kupowrath (12/17/2013) [-]
Well, you don't have to believe me, I really don't care. I didn't think it was against the law for how many people I see walking around with guns. I too, did a google search after you posted that. I see it's against the law.
User avatar #88 to #76 - gorgannan **User deleted account** (12/17/2013) [-]
Most places, open carry is legal and concealed carry isn't. I am 20, and own guns, but I refuse to be "that guy" so no carrying until I turn 21. Not gonna have one on my hip.
User avatar #98 to #75 - thatoneiranianguy ONLINE (12/17/2013) [-]
You can open carry handguns legally on your home property or business property, on respected lands where it's aloud (shooting ranges, hunting reserves, etc.)

You however, can open carry a long gun legally without a permit.
#123 to #75 - gingerjew **User deleted account** (12/17/2013) [-]
That's because those states don't matter
#212 - dtanobo (12/18/2013) [-]
Meanwhile at Dane Cook's house
User avatar #291 to #212 - bionicpanda (12/18/2013) [-]
i think dane cook is pretty funny
#365 to #291 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
i think my left buttcheek is pretty funny too
User avatar #293 to #212 - saltyfries ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
to be fair I love his Kool-Aid routine

OH YEAH!
#253 to #212 - malhaloc (12/18/2013) [-]
is there a thing with dane cook and tumble weeds?
is there a thing with dane cook and tumble weeds?
#265 to #253 - dtanobo (12/18/2013) [-]
It's just an implication of his bad jokes.
#267 to #265 - malhaloc (12/18/2013) [-]
>implication*   
   
Also I don't get it. I might just be tired.
>implication*

Also I don't get it. I might just be tired.
#268 to #267 - dtanobo (12/18/2013) [-]
of course

Well tumbleweed represents a bad joke, thus Dane Cook's house being flooded by tumbleweed. I'm murdering the joke aren't I
#270 to #268 - malhaloc (12/18/2013) [-]
Actually I think I did lol...Time for bed!
Actually I think I did lol...Time for bed!
#198 - someguyonthewebz ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
God bless Texas
#113 - smellmyfaceforswag (12/17/2013) [-]
Some of this stuff doesn't look that bad though.  admit it. That motorized wheel chair looked bad ass.
Some of this stuff doesn't look that bad though. admit it. That motorized wheel chair looked bad ass.
User avatar #121 to #113 - jamesisawesome (12/17/2013) [-]
It wasn't all meant to look bad, just odd.
#290 to #113 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
Found the texan
User avatar #417 to #290 - smellmyfaceforswag (12/19/2013) [-]
Actually Virginian.
#8 - traffy (12/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#187 - earldibblesjr (12/18/2013) [-]
MFW when King of the Hill is actually a pretty accurate depiction of life in Texas


and when I love the Texan lifestyle
User avatar #205 to #187 - Epicgetguy ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
I haven't seen Big Tex in a while since he burned down last year.

How's he looking now?
User avatar #232 to #205 - strangemoo ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
That and everyones pissy that his skins a slightly darker shade, but yeah he's ******* short.
#219 to #205 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
Stupid
User avatar #222 to #219 - Epicgetguy ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
Jesus **** , he got shorter.

His legs look too short for his body.
#342 to #222 - dachief (12/18/2013) [-]
Classic Tex
#316 - stevencolbert (12/18/2013) [-]
Now, I don't know if this is because I'm from Alberta, But this 			****		 looks 			*******		 awesome.   
   
10/10 would live
Now, I don't know if this is because I'm from Alberta, But this **** looks ******* awesome.

10/10 would live
#323 to #316 - kingranch (12/18/2013) [-]
hello fellow albertan. as i kept going through each picture i just kept thinking.... "mhmm... everything i love.... and less snow.... mhmm would snowbird there." aside from the crazy christians i dig texas. i really dig it.
User avatar #394 to #323 - friedgreenpomatoes (12/18/2013) [-]
So wait, what you're telling me that Alberta is basically Canada's Texas?
#413 to #394 - anon (12/19/2013) [-]
yeah, just trade christians for snow and its pretty much the same. oh and we dont have mexicans... but we have newfies... so...
User avatar #324 to #323 - stevencolbert (12/18/2013) [-]
Nice, where are you from?
#325 to #324 - kingranch (12/18/2013) [-]
E-town baby. you?
#376 to #325 - Lukanator (12/18/2013) [-]
Hello, fellow 'tonian.
#330 to #325 - stevencolbert (12/18/2013) [-]
Born in Ponoka, lived around Stettler and Brooks, now I'm ******* stuck west of Swift Current in Saskcrapestan, It was so hard being a Stampeders fan this year.
#412 to #330 - kingranch (12/19/2013) [-]
haha swift current... where the people are neither. thats ok, as much as it pains me to say this at least you can cheer on your teams... edmonton sports ... just... cant...
#414 to #412 - stevencolbert (12/19/2013) [-]
Well, what about?   
Uhhhhhhh   
So how about that?   
Yeah alright
Well, what about?
Uhhhhhhh
So how about that?
Yeah alright
User avatar #39 - ariplayer (12/17/2013) [-]
Texas actually looks so much more fun and so much more safe to live in than many other places of the united states.

someone tell me if i am wrong i dont live in the US lol
User avatar #43 to #39 - coconuthat (12/17/2013) [-]
Well I live here and it's pretty fun! Just hot and dry, but that depends on what part you stay in.
User avatar #61 to #43 - derpwolf ONLINE (12/17/2013) [-]
My brother lives in Ft. Worth, Texas. It's too hot there for me, but it looks like a nice place.
User avatar #161 to #61 - coconuthat (12/18/2013) [-]
It is! and the saying goes is that if you wait 5 minutes the weather will change because it kinda does, one minute its a warm breeze and not too hot then next thing you know its super hot with no wind.
User avatar #393 to #43 - commontroll (12/18/2013) [-]
Good ol' Houston, Texas heat, our very own humidity.
User avatar #409 to #393 - coconuthat (12/18/2013) [-]
Good ol' Odessa heat where its just dry and windy.

I can say is that i like it better in San Antonio.
User avatar #125 to #39 - nommonsterbaa (12/17/2013) [-]
I live in Texas, and as far as I know it's not that great, haven't seen any of the things in this post, at least where I live (near Austin) Basically normal besides weather and the occasional y'all
User avatar #158 to #125 - CHUCKNORRiO (12/18/2013) [-]
That's probably because near austin is one of the few places in texas it isn't like this.
User avatar #275 to #125 - dieterkaiser ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
That's because Austin is the Not Texas of Texas. Ironic, because it's the capitol.
#415 to #125 - anon (12/19/2013) [-]
I live in Austin TX and its pretty "Texan" like. Southern hospitality and all. Ofc we don't have as many horses and cattle and all the stereotypical ranch quality's due to our area and the only place where it is quite noticeably different is downtown round 6th and near campus where its a lot of music and booze . Although compared to other states that i have been to we seem more relaxed and tend to be more polite(drunkards and college pricks omitted).
#380 to #39 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
There's good and bad in every state. For example, people think that anywhere in Michigan, you'll be shot and/or mugged if you even step outside, but that's far from reality. There is quite a bit of farmland, small towns, and lots of forests. There are, of course, more populated and dangerous cities (Detroit and Flint are the first ones that come to peoples' minds), but as long as you use common sense and you're not an idiot, you'll be fine.

Personally, I just find the Texan "culture" kinda stupid and I don't like Southern accents. It makes me wince when I hear a Southern accent. Plus, I hate hot/really warm weather.
User avatar #229 to #39 - ilovetexas (12/18/2013) [-]
**** yeah it is
User avatar #375 to #39 - clittyrubquick (12/18/2013) [-]
I've been to Texas and no one gives a **** down there. It's great.
User avatar #60 to #39 - Blargosnarf (12/17/2013) [-]
every place has it's flaws, every place has it's goods. The citizens might be armed to the teeth, willing to shoot any asshole that decided to pick the wrong day to try to hurt someone, but racism is still rather prevalent more than other places. Also, it's ******* hot, and ******* dry.
User avatar #132 to #60 - ariplayer (12/17/2013) [-]
Too bad about the racism part though, i always thought that Texas was fairly okay in comparison with Mississippi/Missouri/Alabama. or is every state okay in comparison to those states on the matter of racism...?
User avatar #274 to #132 - dieterkaiser ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
Texas racists are very casual racists. I.e. they tell ****** jokes and joke about mexicans but would never lynch anyone purely based on race. Now horse thieves, that's a different story. They string 'em up high.
User avatar #276 to #39 - dieterkaiser ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
They really are as a collective very John Wayne. True southern gentility, will be nice to any stranger, but the second you **** with them the next you're on the ground.
User avatar #350 to #39 - yuukoku (12/18/2013) [-]
It's actually pretty safe as far as people go. As long as you don't go picking fights or starting trouble. Even then, you won't get shot unless you go attacking people with a weapon.
As for the terrain and wildlife, west Texas is hotter than the surface of the sun by day and colder than the dark side of the moon at night. Beware of some of the most deadly snakes in the world, too. Also, scorpions will be the least of your problems if you visit an area that has them. They aren't as terrifying as advertised.
You won't always get executed for killing someone. You will be executed if you kill someone while committing a felony, such as armed robbery (which you don't want to try).

Coming from a Texan.
User avatar #71 to #41 - Crusader (12/17/2013) [-]
******* cazadores
#217 to #41 - tigreman (12/18/2013) [-]
******* CAZADORS
#338 to #41 - lamarisagoodname (12/18/2013) [-]
**** that **** sideways and diagonally thrice with a rake
#215 to #41 - anon (12/18/2013) [-]
******* CAZADORS
#373 to #41 - finntastic (12/18/2013) [-]
Would you just LOOK at how terrifying Texas is? I mean all these black people!
User avatar #354 to #41 - themasterofyou (12/18/2013) [-]
Texas is now on my NOPE list.
#347 - swedishassassin (12/18/2013) [-]
And yet they have one of the best financial standings in the states.
And yet they have one of the best financial standings in the states.
User avatar #372 to #347 - Hells (12/18/2013) [-]
Well they have an entire power grid to themselves and port access.
#192 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
**** yea texas
User avatar #227 to #192 - sonicg (12/18/2013) [-]
Colorado not shown. Colorado is part of Texas.
User avatar #228 to #227 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
it the little square in you tar
upper right
User avatar #230 to #228 - sonicg (12/18/2013) [-]
**** .
User avatar #233 to #230 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
hue hue hue
User avatar #199 to #192 - Zaxplab (12/18/2013) [-]
Lubbock was mentioned


Swell with pride.
User avatar #257 to #199 - leafonthewind (12/18/2013) [-]
fort worth pride son
User avatar #201 to #199 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
sadly my town with 2000 people will never be mentioned on a map like this
User avatar #203 to #201 - Zaxplab (12/18/2013) [-]
Dalhart?
Odonell?
Shalloweater?
Tahoka?
Bee Cave?


Oh, I give up
User avatar #208 to #203 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
Weimar tx
User avatar #259 to #208 - leafonthewind (12/18/2013) [-]
I drove through Weimar

they have a ******* meadery
User avatar #411 to #259 - hairyjonson ONLINE (12/19/2013) [-]
yea
you it good wine to just to expensive the just opened like 2 or 3 years ago
User avatar #258 to #201 - leafonthewind (12/18/2013) [-]
aledo?
#173 - Viceroy ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
Except for Austin.
But they're just another kind of different.
User avatar #210 to #173 - Epicgetguy ONLINE (12/18/2013) [-]
I notice a lot of people from California moved to Austin.

It's still fun but those guys kinda ruin it for me.
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