Beard Explained. Just so everyone knows. I'm using the sum of both the green and red thumbs, and every thumb counts for a day. If I need to amend my plan to gro funny beard Sewall Long
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Beard Explained

Beard Explained. Just so everyone knows. I'm using the sum of both the green and red thumbs, and every thumb counts for a day. If I need to amend my plan to gro

Just so everyone knows. I'm using the sum of both the green and red thumbs, and every thumb counts for a day.

If I need to amend my plan to grow out the best beard in the USA, I will post a followup.

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Views: 17624
Favorited: 10
Submitted: 05/19/2014
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Comments(79):

[ 79 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#15 - athale (05/19/2014) [+] (1 reply)
stickied by Sewallman
User avatar #16 - tranquilizer ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
-"Daddy why is your beard so long? You look like a hobo."
-"Well, son, back in the days before teleportation and a cure for autism were invented, Daddy made a promise on the 'internet', a primitive version of The Megaweb. I promised the users of Funnyjunk and their leader Admin I wouldn't let them down."
#42 - AnonymousDonor (05/20/2014) [-]
yeah i have no idea who you are

and ill never bother to learn
#57 to #42 - stalini (05/20/2014) [-]
WHY DONT YOU LOVE YOUR MOM, YOU BASTARD



IM SO DONE
#62 to #59 - stalini (05/20/2014) [-]
are you done too?
#64 to #62 - AnonymousDonor (05/20/2014) [-]
i dont have a tumblr if thats what youre asking
#66 to #64 - stalini (05/20/2014) [-]
not even close
#6 - letrollzor (05/19/2014) [-]
When you post how your beard ended up in 20 years
When you post how your beard ended up in 20 years
User avatar #25 - kennyh (05/19/2014) [-]
just like admin. Bitching about everything.
A post has not seen that much attention in years and what does he do? Bitch
"Bitch" is admin default setting.
User avatar #60 to #25 - thewilder (05/20/2014) [-]
And it's his fault the site is dying in the first place. Admin bitches at lack of OC and so on, yet his terrible behaviour scared off most users when the site was more populated. Cant blame them, who would make OC for a site that is lead by a douchebag.
User avatar #26 to #25 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
"We need more funny GIFs, Pictures ect. posted daily. Reposts are fine (just don't steal content). Site needs more content uploaded daily."

I posted content that got the most attention up voted and down voted since I started posting content, and he hates me for it
User avatar #27 to #26 - kennyh (05/19/2014) [-]
Remember when admin would send out those emo mass PMs back in the day talking about killing himself?
And then at the most recent "party" he hosted pretty much all he did was talk about eating donuts and killing himself.
I would say he goes up and down but really all he does is go from way down to slightly down.
I can't imagine the kind of mentality it would take to bitch abut you giving his own site attention.
User avatar #33 to #27 - sewallman ONLINE (05/20/2014) [-]
Admin's a good guy, but he has some things that are questionable.

I for one love how our glorious leader lets us visit his great community. Funny Junk numbah one/.s
#21 - include (05/19/2014) [-]
10 years.
10 years.
User avatar #22 to #21 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
Green + red thumbs has a total of 21 years and 6 months.
#23 to #22 - include (05/19/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#34 - infinitereaper (05/20/2014) [-]
My advice is to post yearly updates. Once a year.   
   
Or else people will get tired of you.
My advice is to post yearly updates. Once a year.

Or else people will get tired of you.
#48 to #34 - affects (05/20/2014) [-]
I feel like monthly would be a bit better, since a lot of people will have forgotten after 1 year.
User avatar #49 to #48 - infinitereaper (05/20/2014) [-]
I dunno. With such a long time span, I feel like he should make a post every year with him doing more and more viking like things as his beard achieves enlightenment
#32 - magicianbl (05/20/2014) [-]
I once didn't shave for 14 years. I started shaving at 14. I was really hairy.
#35 to #32 - doktorwhat (05/20/2014) [-]
pics or it didn't happen. I'm currently at 2.5 years. Here's a pic at 1.5 years
User avatar #38 to #35 - guywithguitar (05/20/2014) [-]
Hey it's you again
#68 to #35 - magicianbl (05/20/2014) [-]
I don't have any pics when I was 14. I wore like jogging pants or something all the time. Sorry. It wasn't very impressive or noticeable on face though, but my legs were pretty thick. I was joking with some of my friends that it was like a carpet.
User avatar #45 to #35 - sewallman ONLINE (05/20/2014) [-]
Do you just have glamour shots of 1.5 years beard length?
#67 to #45 - doktorwhat (05/20/2014) [-]
for now. I'm going this weekend for a fall fashion shoot and will have some 2.5 year beard glamour shots soon. Stay tuned...
User avatar #69 to #67 - sewallman ONLINE (05/21/2014) [-]
Please comment them on my content...
User avatar #43 to #35 - tranquilizer ONLINE (05/20/2014) [-]
Eskimo emperor
#19 - spanishninja (05/19/2014) [-]
that beard grew awfully fast for a day 2
that beard grew awfully fast for a day 2
User avatar #20 to #19 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
That was stubble mixed with tar, I'm water proofing an underground parking garage at work right now, so mix that with a ****** cell phone camera and it looks darker than it actually is.
#9 - beren (05/19/2014) [-]
>Pic known for OP not delivering.
>Pic my actual FW OP finally delivers.
The irony.
User avatar #10 to #9 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
I'm going to try my best. A lot of people said that I wouldn't deliver, especially on this post:

www.funnyjunk.com/Freeeeeeeeeee/funny-pictures/5108921/

7000 people said I wouldn't deliver, and then I got front page again when I did deliver. I've done contests like that twice, and I'm probably actually going to do a lot more of them.
User avatar #11 to #10 - beren (05/19/2014) [-]
I think you misunderstood me. I meant that "even though this pic has become known for being used in instances in which 'OP will never deliver,' when he actually does (presumably) deliver on this one, it will be so long from now that this will actually be my face." Hence the irony.
User avatar #12 to #11 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
Ah, triple meaning. Like I stated, I plan on adding a picture of my face in my posts. Maybe once a month make a gif image of the growth or something
User avatar #13 to #12 - beren (05/19/2014) [-]
Can't say I'm not looking forward to this one.
User avatar #2 - jackknapp (05/19/2014) [-]
Well, good luck to you.
Hopefully FJ stays up that long.
User avatar #4 - existenceisfutile (05/19/2014) [-]
Shame about addy being a cunt, but good luck anyway
#1 - onderdonk (05/19/2014) [-]
I believe in you.
I believe in you.
#70 - itsthetie (05/24/2014) [-]
10 years without shaving and all you can grow is 3/4 of a mustache and a bit of stubble on your chin.. I'm honestly looking forward to the results buddy, you're gonna look like ****

pic related it's me
#41 - samoaspider (05/20/2014) [-]
Good job moron, you're doing this for nothing (thumbs) to please people you don't know (community) in order to feel accepted by who  (anonymous 			*********		 on the internet) ?   
   
also admin knows you're 			***********		 and didn't delete the content because he'd suck dick for traffic and overall 			**********		 on this site
Good job moron, you're doing this for nothing (thumbs) to please people you don't know (community) in order to feel accepted by who (anonymous ********* on the internet) ?

also admin knows you're *********** and didn't delete the content because he'd suck dick for traffic and overall ********** on this site
#36 - damping (05/20/2014) [-]
The worst thumb whoring the world has ever seen.
You posted the ******* comments to your old content. You are the reason this site is going under.
#39 to #36 - anon (05/20/2014) [-]
Get over it
User avatar #30 - landartheconqueror (05/20/2014) [-]
if you grow a long beard, you gotta work out a lot and get jacked, so that you get that viking look, and not that greasy hipster look
User avatar #5 - approved (05/19/2014) [-]
I really don't see the point of doing this..why grow out a beard for a site that might not even last for 2015, let alone 15 years or whatever. Even then, people will most likely will forget - it might not be everyone, but most because 15 (or so) years is a hell of a long time.

I'll admit, admin was a bit rude, but he kind of said some truth. You would look homeless, and wouldn't be able to get a job (or might have to shave it, at least). Not only that, but wouldn't it get uncomfortable after awhile?

I know you can do whatever you want, but I felt the need to put my 2 cents into this.
User avatar #7 to #5 - sewallman ONLINE (05/19/2014) [-]
Me and some guy already explained to addy about how in my line of work beards are a very common thing.

I work doing construction and hauling construction materials, so my appearance doesn't matter at all to a work place setting for me.

Opinions are always welcome with me, everyone has one.
User avatar #8 to #7 - approved (05/19/2014) [-]
Oh, I see. Well, that's good, I suppose. Good luck, anyway.
User avatar #79 - oculusmortis (11/09/2014) [-]
**oculusmortis rolls 96** how many seconds ill go without shaving
User avatar #73 - tomahawkkit (08/05/2014) [-]
waitaminute you look alot like a guy named mitch, you name isnt mitch is it?
User avatar #74 to #73 - sewallman ONLINE (08/05/2014) [-]
Taran Drake Sewall, I only know one guy named Mitch, and he's a dick.
User avatar #75 to #74 - tomahawkkit (08/05/2014) [-]
does he look like you
#76 to #75 - sewallman ONLINE (08/05/2014) [-]
idk, this is an old picture.. But still me.
#77 to #76 - sewallman ONLINE (08/05/2014) [-]
This was posted on facebook a little more recently,
#78 to #77 - sewallman ONLINE (08/05/2014) [-]
This picture was taken on our visit to spain
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